Friday, June 24, 2005


I tried to be nice, Tom, I really tried. But I have now seen you on one too many shows talking out of your ASShole about shit that you are not qualified to talk about.
I was just watching Matt Lauer try to talk some sense into your ass, but you weren’t having it, resulting in my screaming at the TV in a way I did not know was in me. (It wasn’t so much a word as it was an extremely loud noise of pure rage.) My face is still pink. It’s too early for this, Tom, I haven’t even finished my coffee yet.
Matt, I’m so sorry you had to go through that, although I truly appreciated your attempt at using actual logic on him.
Yes, Tom, we know people abuse drugs. We know they’re on the street and we know doctors overprescribe them and we know you believe in vitamins. We also know that proper use of medication in fact IS researched and proven and works for millions of people –
I personally know perhaps a higher percentage of these people than most. I am 100% sure that I have read just as much on the subject of psychology as you or any other layperson has, Tom, as it has always been of particular interest to me, and I’ll give you that the mind is not an exact science. But for the love of god, at least I’m aware that this does not qualify me to decide what’s right and wrong for the entire fucking world.
There’s this expression, which I think was at the root of what Matt was trying to say (if I may), I don’t know if you’ve heard it? It goes like this? Live and let live?


B said...

i think Mr. Cruise should go back into his little overpaid for CLOSET and "self-medicate" himself to finally realize his homosexuality--that way he will stop worrying about others and start worrying about why he needs to get so much attention by offending so many people.

here! here!

DAM said...

Tommy, can you hear me? Well, I've got lots to say. Vitamins are not the end all be all. They are not FDA monitored. (Disclaimer: I am not now nor have I ever been employed by the FDA. Ditto for all family members.) Nobody can be 100% sure what's in your vitamin bottle. I'm not dismissing them as you so readily dismiss medication. But, did you see what happened to Lucy when she did the commercial for VitaMeataVegamin?

DAM said...

Awww, hell, I wasn't done. I clicked on the wrong button. Haven't taken my vitamins or meds yet today.

When you open your mouth, Tom, some people listen, though I don't know why. Some poor, depressed person in one of the Dakotas hears you and believes you. There's a man in Wyoming fighting an anxiety disorder and you're convincing him of your PERSONAL belief.

Take all the vitamins you want. Shun medication, if you choose. But don't tell others what to do, unless you're willing to take responsibility for their lives.

Sure, you were cute in Risky Business, but now you're engaging in risky business. Go back to dancing in your tidy whities.

Betsy said...

This is exactly my main issue with Tom talking all this smack, is the guy in North Dakota who stops taking his meds because Tom Cruise said so and then, I don't know what, holds sixteen children hostage in his basement because a Yeti told him to. Celebrities have an incredible amount of power - and many of them use their powers for good: to raise money and awareness for legitimate and meaningful causes. Tom very obviously needs something a little stronger than St. John's Wort right now, IMHO. Uh oh - I've become one of those people.

kfoz said...

Here's an idea:

Tom on Dr. Phil!!!

Betsy said...

Ken, I was actually thinking about this because Dr. Phil would kick his fucking ass, and get great ratings.

kfoz said...

here is a transcript of the whole interview, with great illustrations:

Betsy said...

Thanks, Ken! The pictures are hilarious.

Anonymous said...

What the hell is happening to Tom Cruise? Has he always been this obtuse? How can Matt Lauer keep a straight face when Tom says things like "there's no such thing as a chemical imbalence in the brain"?!!
What a freakshow! I suppose going to university to study how to HELP people of mental anguish has been a waste of time.Its all a hoax! Yeah, that's right Tom, it all can be cured with vitamins and diet...Medication just "masks" the problem.Its just incrediable to watch...much like the Star Wars Kid :):):)

Christopher said...

Tom Cruise Kills Oprah

Betsy said...

Oh my God, my Quicktime won't run the movie... so bummed, but my imagination is running wild!!! Does he kill her by jumping up and down on her?

DAM said...

Would you believe an article in The NY Times lauded Cruise for his performance?! They said he stood up for what he believed in. CNN, on the other hand, questioned his sanity.

Betsy, I also couldn't run the movie, however here's what I think happens: He stuffs her nose with the cotton from a bottle of Tylenol and forces a cup of green tea down the wrong pipe in her throat. Death by asphyxiation. Though Cruise eludes the police for some time, he is finally caught and sent to jail where he falls in love. When Katie visits, he refuses conjugal visits.

Betsy said...

Oh my god, Debra, I'm sure you're right - but are you sure he doesn't also jump up and down on her just for good measure?

Anonymous said...

I think everyone here is losing sight of the big picture that Tom is bringing to light with his latest appearances: when you have reached the pinnacle of superstardom and reality has become a faint twinkle in the sky like Ursula Major, avoid the temptation of nepotism when choosing a new publicist. True, you might think that the rates of a professional agency may be bit steep, but considering the fact that the only experience your loved ones may have in shielding you from your own social fuck ups involve deftly helping you avoid getting beat up from from the neighborhood bully when you were six, it is well worth the extra cash.

(B: This may not apply to you in your case, but I would still watch it once you win your first National Book award)

I would also like to think this highlights the importance of avoiding a teenage beard and in picking a cult to join from a science-fiction writer who doesn't believe that humanity evolved from clams (maybe Isaac Asimov?), but that could just be me.

....BIG fan of psychotropic drugs, especially washed down with vodka

Betsy said...

It's true, superstardom does pick up quite a few passengers and drop them off on a planet where the rules are whatever they pay someone to tell them they are.

I'll look out for that when my book award comes in, though, thanks for the tip.