Monday, January 02, 2006

From The Department Of Does It Get Creepier Than This - Don't Answer That

On the very next page of Harper’s, is a reprint of the instructions for “REALdoll”, a $6500 life-size silicone sex doll. Now, okay, whatever. I know people have their sexual weirdnesses, and you know, it would seem that this could potentially meet certain no-muss no-fuss needs with a little more illusion of verite than a simple blow-up doll. But because this doll requires a certain amount of upkeep (the title of the article is “High Maintenance”) – instructions for use include, when cleaning your doll, “carefully remove the tongue…” “always remove the face slowly, working between Velcro pads to separate…” “tightening the jaw can be done with a Phillips-head screwdriver…” and my personal favorite, “when you wish to use your REALdoll in the ‘face down’ positions, it is highly recommended tar you remove her face.”

I’m thinking, if my lover’s face is you know, detachable, and I have to be the one to detach it, before lovemaking? Mmmm, I might just lose the mood. Because I’m thinking, Westworld? Not a turn-on so much.

1 comment:

B said...

totally westworld! I just saw that on a channel 9 sunday movie event...that really really really really really really really really (time infinity) freaked me out when the two guys were in "cowboy world" and messed around with the robots...really really freaked me out.