Monday, October 03, 2005

Talk Amongst Yourselves

Here are a list of subjects I’m sort of in the mood to write about but haven’t got enough time.

1. Celine Dion. I missed her recent appearance on Larry King, since I don’t have cable, but I heard she was very upset about Katrina when she opened her TV, and that she very much wants to let the people touch the things because they have never touched the things, and they should go ahead and touch the things.

2. Teenagers serving life sentences for murdering people; I’m less sure about whether they should or shouldn’t, serve sentences, than I am in teenagers murdering people. What’s that all about?

3. Extreme Makeover: the lawsuits. One has something to do with a family allegedly ripping off the show somehow by not letting their adopted kids live there or something, the other has to do with a woman getting rejected from the show right before she was supposed to go in for surgery; it was not she who killed herself, but rather her sister for having said hateful things the producers allegedly coached her to say. Both of these cases seem tangential, and yet seem to be a cry for some sort of acknowledgment that these shows – the surgery edition much more so – have a lot of potential for disaster, above and beyond the obvious implications of you know, our obsessive focus on perfection and shit.

4. The Bob Dylan Movie, or:
Why I Just Now Realized I Wasn’t Meant to be A Rock Star, No, For Serious

5.Million Dollar Baby: what’s the big deal?

And one other thing I’m not interested in writing about, but am interested in:
Marcus vs. Franzen: Who would win in a fight?

Jonathan Franzen with an open firehose, or Ben Marcus with a used Prius?


Teodoro Callate said...

1) Celeine Dion. She needs to be fined, and badly.
2) It's about bad news. Don't know what else to say.
3) Duh, wah? huh?
4) Loved it, loved it, loved it. Loved it.
5) I still haven't seen it, so don't nobody give away the super secret ending that I saw on the plane when I was trying to avoid looking up.
6) I'm not smart enough to weigh in on this one.

Betsy said...

Re: 6 - You are too, but I know I'm not! That's why I gave them weapons.

Daniel Ridges said...

Celine Dion always cracks me up. I saw her on Ophrah a few months back. Man, what a ME fest!

Bob Dylan cracks me up for different reasons. I love him, though. Haven't seen the show yet. My Tivo went out 38 minutes into the first night, but I have the entire second night. I just don't have 2 hours and 38 minutes to kill. Is there a super-secret ending to this one, too?

A side note: What's with the word verification with every comment? Does this happen with everyone or is the Man just singling me out!?

tod goldberg said...

More importantly, I think you need to spend some time discussing Bonaduce. I swore I wasn't going to watch that train wreck, but then I got home from your 'hood and Wendy had tivod three of them and, well, the rest is history. That man is nuts...and it is 30 minutes of compelling TV. I just can't figure out if his therapist is actually a lizard, a man wearing a lizard halloween costume, or Charlotte's gay friend from Sex in the City.

Betsy said...

Dan - No super secret ending. And the Man is not singling you out. He's singling out the blammers. Even I have to verify.
Tod - haven't you seen all my Bonaduce rants? Anyway, I have to save something for the book. Yes, his therapist, well even if he looked like George Clooney, we'd have to wonder about him, I think.

Daniel Ridges said...

Friggin' blammers! They're eating me alive! Is it common knowledge that blammers cannot type distorted letters, because I was not aware of this phenomenon...

megan said...

They wouldn't get to the fight. They'd spend too much time considering various theories of fighting and therefore wouldn't ever get to the action.

Angela said...

I swore I wasn't going to watch Bonaduce either and here I am getting sucked into his sad little existence. I listen to Star 98.7 in the mornings to the show he used to be on before he got fired and I still wonder, is this all for the cameras? He says no, but I can't help but think he's so desperate for a comeback that he just might make it a bit worse than it really is. Don't get me wrong. The guy is a nutjob fo'sho.

My money's on Marcus, by the way.

Betsy said...

Megan - that is a very strong theory, I think, although Angela may be right too.
Angela - I don't think even my Danny knows anymore.

mernitman said...

re: the Harpers in Harper's bout, it really is a toss-up as to who, with sheer verbiage as weaponry, would bore whom to death, and someone oughta tap ole Norm Mailer to punch both their lights out -- there's a dude who knew how to Fight.