Thursday, September 28, 2006


Okay look. No comments here about how I’m old. I already know that. It is precisely because I have the wisdom that comes with age that I am entitled to make the following proclamation:

Skinny Jeans: No.
Leggings: MAYbe, but probably no. Leggings, I can’t condemn quite as much as the girls over on Go Fug Yourself. I once wore them and when they went out I missed them. They’re comfy, you can throw anything long enough to cover your over them and it looks a little styley even if you’re feeling bloatey, but and still – I won’t be wearing them again.

I’m no fashionista. I enjoy looking at fashion, I enjoy clothes, I make an effort to have a style that works for me that seems at least marginally current. As a general rule (if not a hard and fast one), I abide by the fashion tenet that if you were there for the first time the thing was in, it’s best to avoid it in it’s second incarnation. I also believe that the young kids have a little more room to experiment with some trendier styles that don’t work as well on, okay fine, me. But there are trends that I feel everyone should say no to. Like:

Skinny Jeans. Listen, I looked the other way during the revival of seventies stuff, which was silly enough, but the eighties? The skinny jeans, they just look weird. Even the leggy models in the Gap ads that are unavoidable in the el, they’re on every wall, they’re even plastered on the freaking floor, look weird in these pants, proportionally it’s just all the way around bizarro. It’s too much information. I am telling you this for your own good. There was nothing wrong with the lovely line of pants in recent years, a slight flare, a slightly lower, flat-front waist is actually very flattering to many folks (I am not talking about any pants with a two-inch zipper), but these pants are just flat out weird. They make everyone look like a lollipop. And I see them on men and women alike. I know – it’s a little bit punk, it’s a little bit “ironic”, whatever. It’s silly.

You know what’s really punk?

Not following trends.


Dean said...

Thank god for a little sanity.

If I were to wear skinny-leg jeans, I'd look like one o' them balloons tied to a denim-coloured stick.

I resisted the skinny-leg jeans the first time round. Only bone-thin 17 year old girls look even halfway decent in them, and let's face it, 17 year old girls look good in just about anything.

I'll make you a deal. I won't wear skinny leg jeans, or obsess about it, if you don't.

Teodoro Callate said...

I distinctly and unfortunately recall the early '90s when I wore tight jeans and sneakers (see early Seinfeld fashion), and I also had long hair and big round plastic glasses (like, Michael Landon hair and Sally Jesse glasses).

Of none of this am I proud.

S-JY said... had me at “Skinny Jeans: No.” If I were a woman of means and leisure, I would've pretended I hadn't read this, then bought and worn some skinny jeans to our session tomorrow just to see if it would elicit any sort of visible response from you.

Ninaba said...

Plus they make your shoes look like klodhoppers!

.25 life crisis kid said...

geez. i feel punk rock for knowing you!