I Can See Why They Left Off “Adventure,” and Even “The”

I have now officially had to release Ben from his atonement for Constantine, as he agreed at my suggestion to go see Poseidon this weekend, which, well, it makes the original look positively brilliant. For one, the cast actually interacted in the original, there was, I daresay, some character development, and if I can’t argue that I can argue that among other things, Carol Lynley’s red hot pants, Stella Stevens in Ernest Borgnine’s shirt, Shelley Winters swimming, the freaking Christmas tree climb, the dude falling through the plate glass ceiling, “There’s gohht to beee a moorning aaahf-tuuuh,” just to name a few things, made for an unforgettable movie, whereas I’ve pretty much already forgotten everything about Poseidon except the twenty bucks we dropped to see it.